‘I love you for your great manners. Oh, I love the way you speak.’ And so on it goes. We are talking about the game of flattery that many people employ to win their love. They find reason to praise each and everything of their partner and the only objective is to make their beloved feel good.

In the initial stage of dating, communication is not very open. Both the partners are guarded and don’t communicate much at the intimate level. As the relationship develops, the closeness increases and so does the communication. Some people employ flattery knowingly or unknowingly in the early stage of dating. They feel that this will break the barriers sooner. They want their partner to feel good and comfortable with them. As all people love to hear praise to a certain extent, most of them get caught in the game of getting flattered. This is how it works, but it damages the relationship as it grows.

As the relationship grows, the flatterer reduces doing it and this creates a vacuum. Now the other partner gets in a phase of doubt. ‘Am I no more good? Have I done some mistake? Why is my partner going away from me? Why no more praise?’ This doubt grows over a period of time and slowly, they understand that the flattery was not truthful. It was no sincere praise and done only to make them feel good. This may break the relationship.

Those who flatter their partner are harming the relationship. They don’t maintain the sanctity of the relationship which should be based on truth, but make it look made up. It is immature to flatter.

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